The slobs holiday егэ ответы

1) Прочитайте текст и запишите в поле ответа цифру 1, 2, 3 или 4, соответствующую выбранному Вами варианту ответа.

Показать текст. ⇓

The parents’ choice of holiday destination made the narrator’s children feel
1) jealous.
2) excited.
3) alarmed.
4) indifferent.


2) Прочитайте текст и запишите в поле ответа цифру 1, 2, 3 или 4, соответствующую выбранному Вами варианту ответа.

Показать текст. ⇓

The narrator’s words ‘A terrible sight for any parent to see’ refer to
1) the way children behave.
2) the fact that children are aging.
3) the way children change their image.
4) the fact there is a generation gap.


3) Прочитайте текст и запишите в поле ответа цифру 1, 2, 3 или 4, соответствующую выбранному Вами варианту ответа.

Показать текст. ⇓

When the need for holiday planning is first announced in the narrator’ family, it
1) is regarded as an important political issue.
2) is met with enthusiasm by all the family.
3) seems like an impossible task.
4) is openly ignored.


4) Прочитайте текст и запишите в поле ответа цифру 1, 2, 3 или 4, соответствующую выбранному Вами варианту ответа.

Показать текст. ⇓

To find a two-week slot for a holiday potential holiday-makers have to
1) negotiate the optimum period for travel.
2) cancel prior business appointments.
3) re-schedule individual summer plans.
4) make a list of the things to be taken into account.


5) Прочитайте текст и запишите в поле ответа цифру 1, 2, 3 или 4, соответствующую выбранному Вами варианту ответа.

Показать текст. ⇓

The slob’s holiday is the type of holiday for people, who
1) do not want to go on holiday abroad.
2) go on holiday with teenagers.
3) do not like public life.
4) prefer peaceful relaxing holidays.


6) Прочитайте текст и запишите в поле ответа цифру 1, 2, 3 или 4, соответствующую выбранному Вами варианту ответа.

Показать текст. ⇓

When the narrator says ‘I also want to live dangerously’, she means
1) getting lost in the crowd.
2) going sightseeing without a guide.
3) choosing herself the parties to go to.
4) lying long hours in the sun on the beach.


7) Прочитайте текст и запишите в поле ответа цифру 1, 2, 3 или 4, соответствующую выбранному Вами варианту ответа.

Показать текст. ⇓

The main reason the narrator doesn’t want to mix up with locals is because she
1) doesn’t let tourists to her house at Leicester.
2) doesn’t want to add to their inconveniencies.
3) is afraid to make friends with local people.
4) values her own privacy above all.

Источник: открытый банк заданий ЕГЭ Раздел: Чтение Тип задания: Multiple choice Скачать the Slob’s holiday.pdf текст/задания В прикрепленном к записи файле содержится демонстрационное задание, находящееся в открытом доступе на официальном сайте fipi.ru. Орфография оригинальная, выделение верных ответов и соответствующих им отрывков текста — мои. Предлагаю разобрать прилагающиеся задания и понять, как сделать правильный выбор. Сперва необходимо вспомнить стратегию выполнения заданий Multiple choice. Состоит она в следующем:

  • Skimming. Быстрое чтение по диагонали. Задача — уловить общий смысл и ключевые слова.
  • Ознакомление с вопросами. Поиск ключевых слов.
  • Scanning. Просмотр текста и поиск фрагментов, соответствующих предложенным вопросам/ответам, с использованием выбранных ключевых слов и синонимов к ним.
  • Carefull reading. Задача — сконцентрироваться на выбранных фрагментах и отыскать, какой из вариантов отвечает на вопрос. Подразумевается, что остальные три варианта — неверны, но вопросы часто составлены так, что с уверенностью этого сказать невозможно. В данных фрагментах важно понять каждую структуру и большую часть содержания.

1. Разберем первое утверждение: «The slob’s holiday is the type of holiday for people, who…» — «»Отпуск лентяя» — это тип отдыха для людей, которые…» Очевидно, нам требуется отыскать отрывок текста, в котором дается развернутое описание того, чем люди занимаются на отдыхе такого вида. Этот отрывок:   «a slob’s holiday: collapse on a sunbed, read a book until the sun goes down, stagger back to hotel room, shower, change into glad rags, eat well, wave goodbye to teenagers, have a last drink on hotel terrace, go to bed and then lie awake and wait for hotel waiters to bring the teenagers from the disco» — «отпуск лентяя: упасть в лежак, читать книгу до заката, добрести до отеля, принять душ, приодеться, хорошенько поесть, провести подростков (вероятно, своих детей), выпить вина на веранде отеля, вернуться в в номер и, не засыпая, ждать пока дети вернутся с дискотеки в сопровождении служащих отеля». Нет необходимости понимать все слова и выражения, используемые в тексте, они заполнены часто непереводимыми разговорными фразами и идиомами (которые, конечно, рекомендуется знать). Однако такие ключевые выражения как «read a book»,  «back to the hotel», «eat well», «have a drink» и «go to bed» легко переводимы даже студентами уровня Elementary и намекают нам на то, что этот тип отдыха подразумевает интенсивное ничегонеделание и поглощение больших количеств пищи и алкоголя. 2. Второе утверждение: «When the narrator says ‘I also want to live dangerously’, she means…» — «слова автора «Я люблю опасность» означают…» Пояснение к утверждению следует в следующем абзаце: «I also want to live dangerously and get brown. I want my doughy English skin change from white sliced to wheat germ. I like the simple pleasure of removing my watch strap and gazing at the patch of virgin skin beneath». Конечно, «live dangerously» — это ирония,. Задача — отделить основное от того, что призвано вас запутать. Ключевые выражения: » I want to…get brown» и «I want my skin…change». Абзац очень иносказательно говорит о потемнении кожи. Из цветов только — «brown». «White sliced» и «wheat germ» — оттенки хлебных продуктов, с которыми автор сравнивает свою «тестообразную» кожу. Она также хочет снять наручные часы после отдыха и лицезреть «первородную» (светлую) полоску кожи. 3. Третье утверждение: «The main reason the narrator doesn’t want to mix up with locals is because she…» — «основная причина, по которой автор не хочет тесно общаться с местными это …». На первый взгляд, ответ «doesn’t let tourists to her house at Leicester» правилен, так как упоминается в тексте: «I do not welcome tourists who come to Leicester into my home», однако это ловушка. Тот факт, что она не пускает туристов в свой дом в Великобритании никак не может служить причиной того, что она сама не ходит в гости, находясь в отпуске. Правильный ответ — «doesn’t want to add to their inconveniencies». Подсказки в тексте: «Why should the locals be expected to [let tourists into their houses]? It’s bad enough that we [cause inconveniences]».

The Slob’s Holiday

My husband and I went to Reno for our holiday last year. ‘Isn’t that place where people go to get a quickie divorce?’ asked my second son. ‘Yes’, I said, trying to look enigmatic and interesting. ‘You are not getting divorced, are you?’ he asked bluntly. ‘No,’ I said, ‘we are going to an outdoor pursuit trade fair.’ The children sighed with relief and slouched away, muttering things like ‘boring’. I call them children, but they are all grown up. My eldest son has started to develop fine lines around his eyes — fledgling crow’s feet. A terrible sight for any parent to see. Anyway, the piece isn’t about children. It’s about holidays.

The first thing to be said about holidays is that anybody who can afford one should be grateful. The second thing is that planning holidays can be hard work. In our household it starts with somebody muttering, ‘I suppose we ought to think about a holiday.’ This remark is usually made in July and is received glumly, as if the person making it has said ‘I suppose we ought to think about the Bolivian balance of payment problems.’

Nothing much happens for a week and then the potential holiday-makers are rounded up and made to consult their diaries. Hospital appointments are taken into consideration, as are important things to do with work. But other highlights on the domestic calendar, such as the cat’s birthday, are swept aside and eventually two weeks are found. The next decision is the most painful: where?
We travel abroad to work quite a lot but we return tired and weary, so the holiday we are planning is a slob’s holiday: collapse on a sunbed, read a book until the sun goes down, stagger back to hotel room, shower, change into glad rags, eat well, wave good-bye to teenagers, have a last drink on hotel terrace, go to bed and then lie awake and wait for hotel waiters to bring the teenagers from the disco.

I never want to be guided around another monument, as long as I live. I do not want to be told how many bricks it took to build it. I have a short attention span for such details. I do not want to attend a ‘folk evening’ ever, ever again. The kind where men with their trousers tucked into their socks wave handkerchiefs in the direction of women wearing puff-sleeved blouses, long skirts and headscarves.

I also want to live dangerously and get brown. I want my doughy English skin change from white sliced to wheat germ. I like the simple pleasure of removing my watch strap and gazing at the patch of virgin skin beneath.

I don’t want to make new friends — on holidays or in general; I can’t manage the ones I have at home. I do not want to mix with the locals and I have no wish to go into their homes. I do not welcome tourists who come to Leicester into my home. Why should the poor locals in Holidayland be expected to? It’s bad enough that we monopolize their beaches, clog their pavements and spend an hour in a shop choosing a sunhat that costs the equivalent of 75 pence.

So, the slob’s holiday has several essential requirements: a hotel on a sunny beach, good food, a warm sea, nightlife for the teenagers, a big crowd to get lost in, and the absence of mosquitoes.
As I write, we are at the planning stage. We have looked through all the holiday brochures, but they are full of references to ‘hospitable locals’, ‘folk nights’, ‘deserted beaches’, and ‘interesting historical sights’. Not our cup of tea, or glass of sangria, at all.

1. The parents’ choice of holiday destination made the narrator’s children feel
1) jealous.
2) excited.
3) alarmed.
4) indifferent.

2. The narrator’s words ‘A terrible sight for any parent to see’ refer to
1) the way children behave.
2) the fact that children are aging.
3) the way children change their image.
4) the fact there is a generation gap.

3. When the need for holiday planning is first announced in the narrator’ family, it
1) is regarded as an important political issue.
2) is met with enthusiasm by all the family.
3) seems like an impossible task.
4) is openly ignored.

4. To find a two-week slot for a holiday potential holiday-makers have to
1) negotiate the optimum period for travel.
2) cancel prior business appointments.
3) re-schedule individual summer plans.
4) make a list of the things to be taken into account.

5. The slob’s holiday is the type of holiday for people, who
1) do not want to go on holiday abroad.
2) go on holiday with teenagers.
3) do not like public life.
4) prefer peaceful relaxing holidays.

6. When the narrator says ‘I also want to live dangerously’, she means
1) getting lost in the crowd.
2) going sightseeing without a guide.
3) choosing herself the parties to go to.
4) lying long hours in the sun on the beach.

7. The main reason the narrator doesn’t want to mix up with locals is because she
1) doesn’t let tourists to her house at Leicester.
2) doesn’t want to add to their inconveniencies.
3) is afraid to make friends with local people.
4) values her own privacy above all.

Тест ЕГЭ-2011 по английскому языку.

Демонстрационный вариант (I).

(Ответы в конце теста)

На экзамене вам предложат прослушать аудиозадания. Здесь аудиоматериал заменен текстом.

Во время выполнения теста по аудированию перед каждым заданием дана пауза с тем, чтобы вы смогли просмотреть вопросы к заданию, а также паузы после первичного и повторного предъявления аудиотекста для внесения ответов.

ЧАСТЬ 1

Прослушайте (прочитайте) 6 высказываний. Установите соответствие между высказываниями каждого говорящего 1 – 6 и утверждениями, данными в списке A – G. Используйте каждое утверждение, обозначенное соответствующей буквой, только один раз. В задании есть одно лишнее утверждение. Вы услышите запись дважды. Занесите свои ответы в таблицу. У вас есть 20 секунд, чтобы ознакомиться с заданием.

Now we are ready to start.

Speaker 1

I love reading. I read detective and spy stories, novels, and romantic and fantasy stories. If I’m stuck on a train or waiting for something and don’t have anything to read, I feel terrible. So something that I spend a lot of money on would probably be books. I always buy a lot of books, magazines and reader’s digests. And I keep all of them at home – my mum says it’s horrible. Also lots of my money goes on audio books. I always share them with friends. Em … it’s kind of an exchange.

Speaker 2

Oh, you know, shiny things really attract me. Every time I have some extra money, I buy bracelets, rings, earrings or necklaces. I wear them everywhere and every day. If I’m shopping somewhere and there is something flashy shining at me, I usually stop and look and very often a salesperson can talk me into buying it. It’s crazy I know. I also love buying books but I don’t spend so much on them.

Speaker 3

Ah, I spend money mostly on um … going out, like going to restaurants or clubs, and things like that. I am a party person, I love hanging out with friends. I don’t actually buy a lot of things, like electronics, books or CDs. I just spend money on going out with my friends, on food and drinks for parties. I really love chatting, dancing and making jokes.

Speaker 4

Something I probably spend too much on is clothes. I guess because I am a girl, I think of shopping as a fun pastime and I find it relaxing. Actually I call it “shopping therapy” to go and buy some new clothes. I often go alone – I don’t need anyone to advise me. I’d say I love the process of choosing and buying things. It really makes me feel good.

Speaker 5

If I had the money I wanted, I would like to go and spend two weeks at every famous place on Earth. I love traveling in comfort. Nowadays it’s very expensive. I read travel magazines and surf the Internet for information about different tours, hotels and sights – and now I know how I want to travel. That’s what I’d spend my money on if I could.

Speaker 6
I usually don’t spend that much money on anything like jewellery or clothes. But then if there is one big expense, it is food. I like desserts, especially ice cream, so when I go out for dinner I definitely have a dessert afterwards. I can’t live without cakes, candies, chocolates and things like that. Who can?

You have 15 seconds to complete the task. (Pause 15 seconds.)

Now you will hear the texts again. (Repeat.)
This is the end of the task. You now have 15 seconds to check your answers.
(Pause 15 seconds.)

В1.

A) Buying things makes the speaker really happy.

B) The speaker likes sweets.

C) The speaker spends large sums of money travelling over the Internet.

D) Having fun with friends is the speaker’s favourite pastime.

E) The speaker has an impressive collection of books.

F) The speaker dreams of going around the world.

G) The speaker loves wearing a lot of jewellery.

1

2

3

4

5

6

Вы услышите (прочитайте) телефонный разговор. Определите, какие из приведенных утверждений А1–А7 соответствуют содержанию текста (1 – True), какие не соответствуют (2 – False) и о чём в тексте не сказано, то есть на основании текста нельзя дать ни положительного, ни отрицательного ответа (3 – Not stated). Выберите номер правильного варианта ответа. Вы услышите запись дважды. У вас есть 20 секунд, чтобы ознакомиться с заданиями.

Now we are ready to start.

Receptionist: English Language Center. How may I help you?

Caller: Yes. I’ve heard about your centre from my classmate and I’m calling to find out more information about your program. What kind of courses do you offer?

Receptionist: Well, first of all, the purpose of our program is to provide language learning opportunities for students who would like to master basic language skills, let’s say, for his or her job, or to study intensively to enter a US college or university.

Caller: Okay. I’m calling for a friend who is interested in attending a US university. Can my friend apply for the next semester?

Receptionist: Well, we start in March and always ask applicants to apply no later than two months before the semester begins.

Caller: Alright. What is the tuition fee for a full-time student?

Receptionist: It’s two thousand and thirty dollars.

Caller: And how does one apply?

Receptionist: Well, we can send you an application and you can mail it back to us, or you can fill out the application form that’s on our website.

Caller: And are there other materials I would need to send in addition to the application form?

Receptionist: Uh, yes. You would need to send in a sponsorship form indicating who will be responsible financially for the student while studying in our program, and a bank statement showing that you or your sponsor has enough money to cover tuition expenses and living costs.

Caller: And how can I send these materials to you?

Receptionist: You can either send the application packet by regular mail or you can fax it.

Caller: Alright. I think that’s about it.

Receptionist: Okay great

Caller: Oh and what is your name?

Receptionist: Ok. My name is Tony Nelson. You can just call and ask for me.

Caller: Great. Thank you for your help.

Receptionist: No problem and please don’t hesitate to call again if you have any other questions.
Caller: Okay. Goodbye.

You have 15 seconds to complete the task. (Pause 15 seconds.)

Now you’ll hear the text again. (Repeat.)

This is the end of the task. You now have 15 seconds to check your answers.

(Pause 15 seconds.)

А1. The caller has learned about the Language Centre from the media.

1) True

2) False

3) Not stated

А2. The centre offers a six-month course for students who want to go to college.

1) True

2) False

3) Not stated

А3. The caller’s friend is attending a US university.

1) True

2) False

3) Not stated

А4. The new semester begins in two months.

1) True

2) False

3) Not stated

А5. You don’t need to come to the centre to sign up for the course.

1) True

2) False

3) Not stated

А6. The centre expects convincing proof that you can afford the course.

1) True

2) False

3) Not stated

А7. All official documents can be sent to the centre by fax.

1) True

2) False

3) Not stated

Вы услышите (прочитайте) интервью. В заданиях А8 – А14 выберите вариант ответа: 1, 2 или 3. Вы услышите запись дважды. У вас есть 50 секунд, чтобы ознакомиться с заданиями.

Now we are ready to start.

Int: Today in the studio we are talking to Ben Zephani, an activist and member of the environmental group the Green Belt Movement in Kenya. Welcome Ben.

Ben: Thank you.

Int: Well, you know, people nowadays talk a lot about environmental issues. There is great concern about wildlife and the future of the National Parks in Kenya. What’s happening there?

Ben: One of the most serious environmental problems we are facing today is deforestation, which really affects both wildlife and people living around the forests. People need land for their own purposes, like growing crops and raising cattle. So they come, seize pieces of land, cut down trees and start cultivating the land. So many animals were, kind of, forced away. They had to leave their native habitats and find new hunting areas… That’s not really a nice thing.

Int: And what’s happening to the people who actually live around the forest area?

Ben: You know when you tend to interfere in a wild animal’s habitat you somehow create an imbalance between people and animals. And sometimes it’s not really a nice thing because animals tend to come close to where people live, which is really threatening.

Int: So, do they attack people?

Ben: Not that they really attack settlements but they do come in packs, groups, prides or herds constantly migrating from one place to another because of deforestation. So people are vulnerable at any time.

Int: You mean, if I lived there, I could be chased by an angry rhinoceros or an elephant?

Ben: No, actually they don’t chase people because most of the time they just pass by. But at times you come into contact with an unusual animal. You know animals live in packs, so when one animal is rejected from its pack, it’s an angry animal. It cannot join the other packs so it attacks anything and is extremely dangerous. It should not be disturbed. People can do nothing to help it. Anyone who dares to approach it is almost certainly doomed.

Int: Wow! Sounds horrible! I suppose no one would dare to try to catch these wild animals … Well, but what actually causes deforestation?

Ben: People burn wood to produce charcoal and sell it, because, as you know, people there have very poor living conditions, and they try hard to earn an extra dime to support their families. Charcoal is in great demand for cooking and other odd jobs, so people don’t even have to travel anywhere to sell it. It’s a good job. But it’s so destructive.

Int: So what’s being done to try and remedy this, or to try and counterbalance the effect?

Ben: There are three or four large activist groups that are coming together to discuss how to reduce damage to the environment. You all know the Nobel Prize winner Wangari Maathai who is a leader of the Green Belt Movement in Kenya. She’s been trying to discourage people from destroying forests for a long time and to explain what deforestation does to the country and the environment in general and how it affects people in the forest areas. She teaches people to adjust to new conditions and environments. She moves with the times. Wangari supports National parks, conservation areas and safari parks in the country. She helps organize small businesses to learn to earn from ecotourism in the forest areas.

Int: Look, I’ve always wanted to go to Africa and I’m just wondering, if that whole safari business … is really good; if everything you see on the BBC Wildlife channel, you know, documentaries, is true to life.

Ben: It’s not a cliché, but it’s something you have to experience when you get there on safari. The BBC has never lied to their viewers.

Int: Wow! So I could be just out there … driving around in my car and on my own just seeing all those animals?

Ben: I am afraid they won’t let you drive in your own car. They provide services for you. We have in Kenya an institute called the KWS: the Kenya Wildlife Service and it has its own wardens that are highly trained to protect you when you’re in the forest. You just say where and when you want to go, what places and animals you would like to see. Tours are kind of regulated. For example, you will never be allowed to come close to feeding the animals.

Int: All right.

You have 15 seconds to complete the task. (Pause 15 seconds.)

Now you will hear the text again. (Repeat.)

This is the end of the task. You now have 15 seconds to check your answers.

(Pause 15 seconds.) 

А8. There is a growing tendency in Kenya to

1) look for new farm land.

2) explore new hunting areas

3) preserve native animal habitats

А9. According to Ben, people living around the forest area

1) try to domesticate some of the wild animals.

2) do their best to stop deforestation in the area.

3) could be in danger from wild animals.

А10. According to Ben, an excommunicated animal is

1) an animal doomed to extinction.

2) an aggressive and uncontrollable animal.

3) an animal that needs people’s help.

А11. Ben claims that people living around the forest area make extra money

1) catching and selling wild animals to the zoos.

2) travelling to other regions and doing odd jobs.

3) trading wooden products.

А12. The Green Belt Movement in Kenya aims at

1) effective exploitation of natural forests.

2) replacing destroyed forests.

3) moving people out from the forest area.

А13. The interviewer is curious to know if

1) the BBC has ever shown programs about wildlife protection in Kenya.

2) all the facts about safari in Kenya presented on BBC television are true.

3) people in Kenya have ever seen any BBC wildlife programs.

А14. Visitors to safari parks in Kenya are allowed to

1) choose their own routes.

2) feed wild animals.

3) drive their own cars.

ЧАСТЬ 2

B2. Установите соответствие между заголовками 1 – 8 и текстами A – G. Занесите свои ответы в таблицу. Используйте каждую букву только один раз. В задании один заголовок лишний.

1) First computers

2) Risky sport

3) Shopping in comfort

4) Difficult task

5) Professional sport

6) Shopping from home 

7) New users

8) Digging for the past

A) A group of university students from Brazil have been given the job of discovering and locating all the waterfalls in their country. It is not easy because very often the maps are not detailed. The students have to remain in water for long periods of time. Every day they cover a distance of 35 to 40 kilometers through the jungle, each carrying 40 kilos of equipment.

B) For many years now, mail-order shopping has served the needs of a certain kind of customers. Everything they order from a catalogue is delivered to their door. Now, though, e-mail shopping on the Internet has opened up even more opportunities for this kind of shopping.

C) Another generation of computer fans has arrived. They are neither spotty schoolchildren nor intellectual professors, but pensioners who are learning computing with much enthusiasm. It is particularly interesting for people suffering from arthritis as computers offer a way of writing nice clear letters. Now pensioners have discovered the Internet and at the moment they make up the fastest growing membership.

D) Shopping centres are full of all kinds of stores. They are like small, self-contained towns where you can find everything you want. In a large centre, shoppers can find everything they need without having to go anywhere else. They can leave their cars in the shopping centre car park and buy everything in a covered complex, protected from the heat, cold or rain.

E) Not many people know that, back in the fifties, computers were very big, and also very slow. They took up complete floors of a building, and were less powerful, and much slower than any of today’s compact portable computers. At first, the data they had to process and record was fed in on punched-out paper; later magnetic tape was used, but both systems were completely inconvenient.

F) Potholing is a dull name for a most interesting and adventurous sport. Deep underground, on the tracks of primitive men and strange animals who have adapted to life without light, finding unusual landscapes and underground lakes, the potholer lives an exciting adventure. You mustn’t forget, though, that it can be quite dangerous. Without the proper equipment you can fall, get injured or lost.

G) Substantial remains of an octagonal Roman bath house, probably reused as a Christian baptistry, have been uncovered during a student training excavation near Faversham in Kent. The central cold plunge pool was five metres across, and stood within a structure which also had underfloor heating and hot pools, probably originally under a domed roof.

A

B

C

D

E

F

G

B3. Прочитайте текст и заполните пропуски1A – F частями предложений, обозначенными цифрами 1 – 7. Одна из частей в списке 1 – 7 – лишняя. Занесите цифру, обозначающую соответствующую часть предложения, в таблицу.

Before the Hubble Space Telescope was launched, scientists thought they knew the universe. They were wrong.

he Hubble Space Telescope has changed many scientists’ view of the universe. The telescope is named after American astronomer Edwin Hubble, A ________________________ .

He established that many galaxies exist and developed the first system for their classifications.

In many ways, Hubble is like any other telescope. It simply gathers light. It is roughly the size of a large school bus. What makes Hubble special is not what it is, B ________________________ .

Hubble was launched in 1990 from the “Discovery” space shuttle and it is about 350 miles above our planet, C ________________________ .

It is far from the glare of city lights, it doesn’t have to look through the air, D______________________.

And what a view it is! Hubble is so powerful it could spot a fly on the moon.

Yet in an average orbit, it uses the same amount of energy as 28 100-watt light bulbs. Hubble pictures require no film. The telescope takes digital images  E________________________ .

Hubble has snapped photos of storms on Saturn and exploding stars. Hubble doesn’t just focus on our solar system. It also peers into our galaxy and beyond. Many Hubble photos show the stars that make up the Milky Way galaxy. A galaxy is a city of stars.

Hubble cannot take pictures of the sun or other very bright objects, because doing so could “fry” the telescope’s instruments, but it can detect infrared and ultra violet light F_______________________ .

Some of the sights of our solar system that Hubble has glimpsed may even change the number of planets in it.

1) which is above Earth’s atmosphere.

2) which are transmitted to scientists on Earth.

3) which is invisible to the human eye.

4) who calculated the speed at which galaxies move.

5) so it has a clear view of space.

6) because many stars are in clouds of gas.

7) but where it is.

A

B

C

D

E

F

Прочитайте текст и выполните задания А15 – А21. В каждом задании выберите вариант ответа: 1, 2, 3 или 4.

The Slob’s Holiday

       My husband and I went to Reno for our holiday last year. “Isn’t that place where people go to get a quickie divorce?” asked my second son? ‘Yes’, I said, trying to look enigmatic and interesting. ‘You are not getting divorced, are you?’ he asked bluntly. ‘No,’ I said, ’we are going to an outdoor pursuit trade fair. The children sighed with relief and slouched away, muttering things like ‘boring’. I call them children, but they are all grown up. My eldest son has started to develop fine lines around his eyes – fledgling crow’s feet. A terrible sight for any parent to see. Anyway, the piece isn’t about children. It’s about holidays.

       The first thing to be said about holidays is that anybody who can afford one should be grateful. The second thing is that planning holidays can be hard work. In our household it starts with somebody muttering, ’I suppose we ought to think about a holiday.’ This remark is usually made in July and is received glumly, as if the person making it has said ‘I suppose we ought to think about the Bolivian balance of payment problems.

       Nothing much happens for a week and then the potential holiday-makers are rounded up and made to consult their diaries. Hospital appointments are taken into consideration, as are important things to do with work. But other highlights on the domestic calendar, such as the cat’s birthday, are swept aside and eventually two weeks are found. The next decision is the most painful: where?

       We travel abroad to work quite a lot but we return tired and weary, so the holiday we are planning is a slob’s holiday: collapse on a sunbed, read a book until the sun goes down, stagger back to hotel room, shower, change into glad rags, eat well, wave good-bye to teenagers, have a last drink on hotel terrace, go to bed and then lie awake and wait for hotel waiters to bring the teenagers from the disco.

       I never want to be guided around another monument, as long as I live. I do not want to be told how many bricks it took to build it. I have a short attention span for such details. I do not want to attend a ‘folk evening’ ever, ever again. The kind where men with their trousers tucked into their socks wave handkerchiefs in the direction of women wearing puff-sleeved blouses, long skirts and headscarves.

       I also want to live dangerously and get brown. I want my doughy English skin change from white sliced to wheat germ. I like the simple pleasure of removing my watch strap and gazing at the patch of virgin skin beneath.

       I don’t want to make new friends – on holidays or in general; I can’t manage the ones I have at home. I do not want to mix with the locals and I have no wish to go into their homes. I do not welcome tourists who come to Leicester into my home. Why should the poor locals in Holidayland be expected to? It’s bad enough that we monopolize their beaches, clog their pavements and spend an hour in a shop choosing a sunhat that costs the equivalent of 75 pence.

       So, the slob’s holiday has several essential requirements: a hotel on a sunny beach, good food, a warm sea, nightlife for the teenagers, a big crowd to get lost in, and the absence of mosquitoes.

       As I write, we are at the planning stage. We have looked through all the holiday brochures, but they are full of references to ‘hospitable locals’, ‘folk nights’, ‘deserted beaches’, and ‘interesting historical sights’. Not our cup of tea, or glass of sangria, at all.

A15. The parents’ choice of holiday destination made the narrator’s children feel

1) jealous.

2) excited.

3) alarmed.

4) indifferent.

A16. The narrator’s words ‘A terrible sight for any parent to see’ refer to

1) the way children behave.

2) the fact that children are aging.

3) the way children change their image.

4) the fact there is a generation gap.

A17. When the need for holiday planning is first announced in the narrator’ family, it

1) is regarded as an important political issue.

2) is met with enthusiasm by all the family.

3) seems like an impossible task.

4) is openly ignored.

A18. To find a two-week slot for a holiday potential holiday-makers have to

1) negotiate the optimum period for travel.

2) cancel prior business appointments.

3) re-schedule individual summer plans.

4) make a list of the things to be taken into account.

A19. The slob’s holiday is the type of holiday for people, who

1) do not want to go on holiday abroad.

2) go on holiday with teenagers.

3) do not like public life.

4) prefer peaceful relaxing holidays.

A20. When the narrator says ‘I also want to live dangerously’, she means

1) getting lost in the crowd.

2) going sightseeing without a guide.

3) choosing herself the parties to go to.

4) lying long hours in the sun on the beach.

A21. The main reason the narrator doesn’t want to mix up with locals is because she

1) doesn’t let tourists to her house at Leicester.

2) doesn’t want to add to their inconveniencies.

3) is afraid to make friends with local people.

4) values her own privacy above all.

ЧАСТЬ 3

Прочитайте приведённый ниже текст. Преобразуйте, если необходимо, слова, напечатанные заглавными буквами в конце строк, обозначенных номерами B4 – B10, так чтобы они грамматически соответствовали содержанию текста. Заполните пропуски полученными словами. Каждый пропуск соответствует отдельному заданию из группы B4 – B10. Пробелы и другие разделительные символы между словами не используются.

A Smart Boy

B4.

Mr. Jones and Mr. Brown worked in the same office. Their _______ were good friends. One day Mr. Jones invited to Mr. Brown to a small party. Mr. Brown went into the other room and telephoned his wife

WIFE

B5.

When he came back Mr. Jones asked him, “Have you spoken to your wife already?”

“No, she ________ there when I phoned. My small son answered the phone. I asked him, “Is your mother there?” And he said, “She is somewhere outside”.

NOT BE

B6.

“Why is she outside?” I asked. “She _______ for me”, he answered.

LOOK

The Great Wall of China

B7.

The Great Wall of China runs for 6,700 kilometers from east to west of China. It is one of the ________ wonders of the world.

GREAT

B8.

The Great Wall _______ in order to protect the country form different aggressors.

BUILD

B9.

The construction of the Wall ________ in the 6th century BC and lasted until the 16th century AD.

BEGIN

B10.

Since then, the Great Wall of China ________ a Symbol of wisdom and bravery of the Chinese people and a monument to Chinese nation for many hundreds of years.

BECOME

Прочитайте приведенный ниже текст. Преобразуйте, если необходимо, слова, напечатанные заглавными буквами в конце строк, обозначенных номерами В11 – В16, так чтобы они грамматически и лексически соответствовали содержанию текста. Заполните пропуски полученными словами. Каждый пропуск соответствует отдельному заданию из группы В11 – В16. Пробелы и другие разделительные символы между словами не используются/

UK: Conservation and Environment

B11.

Going for a walk is the most popular leisure activity in Britain. Despite its high ________ density and widespread, the UK has many unspoilt rural and coastal areas.

POPULATE

B12.

Twelve National Parks are freely accessible to the public and were created to conserve the ________ beauty, wildlife and cultural heritage they contain.

NATURE

B13.

Most of the land in National Parks is privately owned, but administered by an independent National Park Authority which works to balance the expectations of ________ with the need to conserve these open spaces for future generations.

VISIT

B14.

The UK also works to improve the global environment and has taken global warming ________ ever since scientists discovered the hole in the ozone layer.

SERIOUS

B15.

In 1997, the UK subscribed to the Kyoto Protocol binding developed countries to reduce emissions of the six main greenhouse gases. The Protocol declares environmental ________

PROTECT

B16.

Nowadays British ________ are taking part in one of the largest international projects that is undertaken to protect endangered species.

SCIENCE

Прочитайте текст с пропусками, обозначенными номерами А22 – А28. Эти номера соответствуют заданиям A22 – A28, в которых представлены возможные варианты ответов. Выберите вариант ответа.

Tracy 

       Tracy was as excited as a child about her first trip abroad. Early in the morning, she stopped at a A22_______ agency and reserved a suite on the Signal Deck of the Queen Elizabeth II. The next three days she spent buying clothes and luggage.

       On the morning of the sailing, Tracy hired a limousine to drive her to the pier. When she A23_______ at Pier 90, where the Queen Elizabeth II was docked, it was crowded with photographers and television reporters, and for a moment Tracy was panic stricken. Then she realized they were interviewing the two men posturing at the foot of the gangplank. The members of the crew were helping the passengers with their luggage. On deck, a steward looked at Tracy’s ticket and A24_______ her to her stateroom. It was a lovely suite with a private terrace. It had been ridiculously expensive but Tracy A25_______ it was worth it.

       She unpacked and then wandered along the corridor. In almost every cabin there were farewell parties going on, with laughter and champagne and conversation. She felt a sudden ache of loneliness. There was no one to see her A26_______, no one for her to care about, and no one who cared about her. She was sailing into a completely unknown future.

       Suddenly she felt the huge ship shudder as the tugs started to pull it out of the harbor, and she stood A27_______ the passengers on the boat deck, watching the Statue of Liberty slide out of A28_______, and then she went exploring.

В каждом задании выберите один ответ.

A22.

1) journey

2) trip

3) travel

4) tourist

А23.

1) achieved

2) arrived

3) entered

4) reached

А24.

1) set

2) came

3) headed

4) directed

А25.

1) determined

2) resolved

3) decided

4) assured

А26.

1) in

2) off

3) of

4) after

А27.

1) among

2) along

3) between

4) besides

А28.

1) glance

2) stare

3) sight

4) look

Ответы:

ЧАСТЬ 1

ЧАСТЬ 2

ЧАСТЬ 3

B1

1E, 2G, 3D, 4A, 5F, 6B

B2

A4, B6, C7, D3, E1, F2, G8

B4

wives

A1

2

B3

A4, B7, C1, D5, E2, F3

B5

wasn’t

A2

3

A15

3

B6

waslooking

A3

2

A16

2

B7

greatest

A4

3

A17

3

B8

wasbuilt

A5

1

A18

1

B9

began

A6

1

A19

4

B10

hasbecome

A7

1

A20

4

B11

population

A8

1

A21

2

B12

natural

A9

3

B13

visitors

A10

2

B14

seriously

A11

3

B15

protection

A12

1

B16

scientists

A13

2

А22

3

A14

1

А23

2

А24

4

А25

3

А26

2

А27

1

А28

3

Прочитайте текст и выполните задания А15–А21. В каждом задании обведите цифру 1, 2, 3 или 4, соответствующую выбранному вами варианту ответа.

The Slob’s Holiday

My husband and I went to Reno for our holiday last year. “Isn’t that place where people go to get a quickie divorce?”asked my second son? ‘Yes’, I said, trying to look enigmatic and interesting. ‘You are not getting divorced, are you?’ he asked bluntly. ‘No,’ I said, ’we are going to an outdoor pursuit trade fair. The children sighed with relief and slouched away, muttering things like ‘boring’. I call them children, but they are all grown up. My eldest son has started to develop fine lines around his eyes – fledgling crow’s feet. A terrible sight for any parent to see. Anyway, the piece isn’t about children. It’s about holidays.

The first thing to be said about holidays is that anybody who can afford one should be grateful. The second thing is that planning holidays can be hard work. In our household it starts with somebody muttering, ’I suppose we ought to think about a holiday.’ This remark is usually made in July and is received glumly, as if the person making it has said ‘I suppose we ought to think about the Bolivian balance of payment problems.’

Nothing much happens for a week and then the potential holiday-makers are rounded up and made to consult their diaries. Hospital appointments are taken into consideration, as are important things to do with work. But other highlights on the domestic calendar, such as the cat’s birthday, are swept aside and eventually two weeks are found. The next decision is the most painful: where?

We travel abroad to work quite a lot but we return tired and weary, so the holiday we are planning is a slob’s holiday: collapse on a sunbed, read a book until the sun goes down, stagger back to hotel room, shower, change into glad rags, eat well, wave good-bye to teenagers, have a last drink on hotel terrace, go to bed and then lie awake and wait for hotel waiters to bring the teenagers from the disco.

I never want to be guided around another monument, as long as I live. I do not want to be told how many bricks it took to build it. I have a short attention span for such details. I do not want to attend a ‘folk evening’ ever, ever again. The kind where men with their trousers tucked into their socks wave handkerchiefs in the direction of women wearing puff-sleeved blouses, long skirts and headscarves.

I also want to live dangerously and get brown. I want my doughy English skin change from white sliced to wheat germ. I like the simple pleasure of removing my watch strap and gazing at the patch of virgin skin beneath.

I don’t want to make new friends – on holidays or in general; I can’t manage the ones I have at home. I do not want to mix with the locals and I have no wish to go into their homes. I do not welcome tourists who come to Leicester into my home. Why should the poor locals in Holidayland be expected to? It’s bad enough that we monopolize their beaches, clog their pavements and spend an hour in a shop choosing a sunhat that costs the equivalent of 75 pence.

So, the slob’s holiday has several essential requirements: a hotel on a sunny beach, good food, a warm sea, nightlife for the teenagers, a big crowd to get lost in, and the absence of mosquitoes.

As I write, we are at the planning stage. We have looked through all the holiday brochures, but they are full of references to ‘hospitable locals’, ‘folk nights’, ‘deserted beaches’, and ‘interesting historical sights’. Not our cup of tea, or glass of sangria, at all.

А15. The parents’ choice of holiday destination made the narrator’s children feel 
1) jealous. 
2) excited. 
3) alarmed. 
4) indifferent. 

А16.The narrator’s words ‘A terrible sight for any parent to see’ refer to 
1) the way children behave. 
2) the fact that children are aging. 
3) the way children change their image. 
4) the fact there is a generation gap. 

А17.When the need for holiday planning is first announced in the narrator’ family, it 
1) is regarded as an important political issue. 
2) is met with enthusiasm by all the family. 
3) seems like an impossible task. 
4) is openly ignored. 

А18.To find a two-week slot for a holiday potential holiday-makers have to 
1) negotiate the optimum period for travel. 
2) cancel prior business appointments. 
3) re-schedule individual summer plans. 
4) make a list of the things to be taken into account. 

А19.The slob’s holiday is the type of holiday for people, who

1)do not want to go on holiday abroad.

2)go on holiday with teenagers.

3)do not like public life.

4)prefer peaceful relaxing holidays.

А20. When the narrator says ‘I also want to live dangerously’, she means

1)getting lost in the crowd.

2)going sightseeing without a guide.

3)choosing herself the parties to go to.

4)lying long hours in the sun on the beach.

А21. The main reason the narrator doesn’t want to mix up with locals is because she

1)doesn’t let tourists to her house at Leicester.

2)doesn’t want to add to their inconveniencies.

3)is afraid to make friends with local people.

4)values her own privacy above all.

В2. Установите соответствие между заголовками 1–8 и текстами A–G. 
Занесите свои ответы в таблицу. Используйте каждую цифру только
один раз. В задании один заголовок лишний.

1. First computers 
2. Risky sport
3. Shopping in comfort 
4. Difficult task

5. Professional sport 

6. Shopping from home 

7. New users 

8. Digging for the past 
A. A group of university students from Brazil have been given the job of 
discovering and locating all the waterfalls in their country. It is not easy 
because very often the maps are not detailed. The students have to remain in 
water for long periods of time. Every day they cover a distance of 35 to 40 
kilometers through the jungle, each carrying 40 kilos of equipment. 
B. For many years now, mail-order shopping has served the needs of a certain 
kind of customers. Everything they order from a catalogue is delivered to 
their door. Now, though, e-mail shopping on the Internet has opened up even 
more opportunities for this kind of shopping. 
C. Another generation of computer fans has arrived. They are neither spotty 
schoolchildren nor intellectual professors, but pensioners who are learning 
computing with much enthusiasm. It is particularly interesting for people 
suffering from arthritis as computers offer a way of writing nice clear letters. 
Now pensioners have discovered the Internet and at the moment they make 
up the fastest growing membership. 
D. Shopping centres are full of all kinds of stores. They are like small, 
self-contained towns where you can find everything you want. In a large 
centre, shoppers can find everything they need without having to go 
anywhere else. They can leave their cars in the shopping centre car park and 
buy everything in a covered complex, protected from the heat, cold or rain. 
E. Not many people know that, back in the fifties, computers were very big, 
and also very slow. They took up complete floors of a building, and were 
less powerful, and much slower than any of today’s compact portable 
computers. At first, the data they had to process and record was fed in on 
punched-out paper; later magnetic tape was used, but both systems were 
completely inconvenient. 
F. Potholing is a dull name for a most interesting and adventurous sport. Deep 
underground, on the tracks of primitive men and strange animals who have 
adapted to life without light, finding unusual landscapes and underground 
lakes, the potholer lives an exciting adventure. You mustn’t forget, though, 
that it can be quite dangerous. Without the proper equipment you can fall, 
get injured or lost. 
G. Substantial remains of an octagonal Roman bath house, probably reused as a 
Christian baptistry, have been uncovered during a student training 
excavation near Faversham in Kent. The central cold plunge pool was five 
metres across, and stood within a structure which also had underfloor 
heating and hot pools, probably originally under a domed roof. 

В3. Прочитайте текст и заполните пропуски A–F частями предложений, 
обозначенными цифрами 1–7. Одна из частей в списке 1–7 лишняя. 
Занесите цифру, обозначающую соответствующую часть предложения, 
в таблицу. 

 Before the Hubble Space Telescope was launched, scientists thought they 
knew the universe. They were wrong. 
 The Hubble Space Telescope has changed many scientists’ view of the 
universe. The telescope is named after American astronomer Edwin Hubble, 
A _______________________. 
He established that many galaxies exist and developed the first system for their 
classifications. 
 In many ways, Hubble is like any other telescope. It simply gathers light. 
It is roughly the size of a large school bus. What makes Hubble special is not 
what it is, B _______________________. 
 Hubble was launched in 1990 from the “Discovery” space shuttle and it is 
about 350 miles above our planet, C _______________________. 
It is far from the glare of city lights, it doesn’t have to look through the air, 
D _______________________. 
And what a view it is! Hubble is so powerful it could spot a fly on the moon. 
 Yet in an average orbit, it uses the same amount of energy as 28 100-watt 
light bulbs. Hubble pictures require no film. The telescope takes digital images 
E _______________________. 
Hubble has snapped photos of storms on Saturn and exploding stars. Hubble 
doesn’t just focus on our solar system. It also peers into our galaxy and beyond. 
Many Hubble photos show the stars that make up the Milky Way galaxy. A 
galaxy is a city of stars. 
 Hubble cannot take pictures of the sun or other very bright objects, 
because doing so could “fry” the telescope’s instruments, but it can detect 
infrared and ultra violet light F _______________________. 
 Some of the sights of our solar system that Hubble has glimpsed may even 
change the number of planets in it. 
1. which is above Earth’s atmosphere. 
2. which are transmitted to scientists on Earth. 
3. which is invisible to the human eye. 
4. who calculated the speed at which galaxies move. 
5. so it has a clear view of space. 
6. because many stars are in clouds of gas. 
7. but where it is. 

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Единый государственный экзамен по ИНОСТРАННЫМ ЯЗЫКАМ

Демонстрационный вариант контрольных измерительных материалов единого государственного экзамена 2011 года по английскому языку

подготовлен Федеральным государственным научным учреждением «ФЕДЕРАЛЬНЫЙ ИНСТИТУТ ПЕДАГОГИЧЕСКИХ ИЗМЕРЕНИЙ»

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 2 )

Единый государственный экзамен по АНГЛИЙСКОМУ ЯЗЫКУ

Пояснения к демонстрационному варианту контрольных измерительных материалов единого государственного экзамена

2011 года по английскому языку

При ознакомлении с демонстрационным вариантом контрольных измерительных материалов ЕГЭ 2011 года следует иметь в виду, что задания, в него включенные, не отражают всех вопросов содержания, которые будут проверяться с помощью вариантов КИМ в 2011 году. Полный перечень вопросов, которые могут контролироваться на едином государственном экзамене 2011 года, приведен в кодификаторе элементов содержания и требований к уровню подготовки выпускников общеобразовательных учреждений для единого государственного экзамена 2011 года по английскому языку.

Назначение демонстрационного варианта заключается в том, чтобы дать возможность любому участнику ЕГЭ и широкой общественности со- ставить представление о структуре будущих КИМ, количестве заданий, их форме, уровне сложности. Приведенные критерии оценки выполнения заданий с развернутым ответом, включенные в этот вариант, дают представление о требованиях к полноте и правильности записи развернутого ответа.

Эти сведения позволят выпускникам выработать стратегию подготовки к ЕГЭ.

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 3 )

Демонстрационный вариант контрольных измерительных материалов единого государственного экзамена

2011 года по английскому языку Инструкция по выполнению работы

Экзаменационная работа по английскому языку состоит из четырех разделов, включающих 46 заданий.

Раздел 1 («Аудирование») включает 15 заданий, из которых первое – на установление соответствия и 14 заданий с выбором одного правильного ответа из трех предложенных. Рекомендуемое время на выполнение раздела 1 – 30 минут.

Раздел 2 («Чтение») включает 9 заданий, из которых 2 задания на установление соответствия и 7 заданий с выбором одного правильного ответа из четырех предложенных. Рекомендуемое время на выполнение раздела 2 – 30 минут.

Раздел 3 («Грамматика и лексика») включает 20 заданий, из которых 13 заданий с кратким ответом и 7 заданий с выбором одного правильного ответа из четырех предложенных. При выполнении заданий с кратким ответом вы должны самостоятельно записать ответ в соответствующем месте работы. Рекомендуемое время на выполнение раздела 3 – 40 минут.

По окончании выполнения заданий каждого из этих разделов не забывайте переносить свои ответы в бланк ответов № 1.

Раздел 4 («Письмо») состоит из двух заданий и представляет собой небольшую письменную работу (написание личного письма и письменного высказывания с элементами рассуждения). Рекомендуемое время на выполнение этого раздела работы – 60 минут. Черновые пометки делаются прямо на листе с заданиями (они не оцениваются), и только полный вариант ответа заносится в бланк ответов № 2.

Общее время проведения экзамена – 160 минут.

Рекомендуется выполнять задания в том порядке, в котором они даны. Постарайтесь выполнить как можно больше заданий и набрать наибольшее количество баллов.

Желаем успеха!

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 4 )

Раздел 1. Аудирование

Вы услышите 6 высказываний. Установите соответствие между высказываниями каждого говорящего 1–6 и утверждениями, данными в списке A–G. Используйте каждое утверждение, обозначенное соответствующей буквой, только один раз. В задании есть одно лишнее утверждение. Вы

услышите запись дважды. Занесите свои ответы в таблицу.

A. Buying things makes the speaker really happy.

B. The speaker likes sweets.

C. The speaker spends large sums of money travelling over the Internet. D. Having fun with friends is the speaker’s favourite pastime.

E. The speaker has an impressive collection of books.

F. The speaker dreams of going around the world.

G. The speaker loves wearing a lot of jewellery.

Говорящий

1

2

3

4

5

6

Утверждение

Вы услышите телефонный разговор. Определите, какие из приведенных

утверждений А1–А7 соответствуют содержанию текста (1 – True), ка-

кие не соответствуют (2 – False) и о чем в тексте не сказано, то есть на

основании текста нельзя дать ни положительного, ни отрицательного

ответа (3 – Not stated). Обведите номер выбранного вами варианта от-

вета. Вы услышите запись дважды.

The caller has learned about the Language Centre from the media.

1)

True

2)

False

3)

Not stated

The centre offers a six-month course for students who want to go to college.

1)

True

2)

False

3)

Not stated

The caller’s friend is attending a US university.

1)

True

2)

False

3)

Not stated

The new semester begins in two months.

1)

True

2)

False

3)

Not stated

You don’t need to come to the centre to sign up for the course.

1)

True

2)

False

3)

Not stated

The centre expects convincing proof that you can afford the course.

1)

True

2)

False

3)

Not stated

All official documents can be sent to the centre by fax.

1)

True

2)

False

3)

Not stated

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

A8

A9

A10

A11

A12

A13

A14

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 5 )

Вы услышите интервью. В заданиях А8–А14 обведите цифру 1, 2 или 3, соответствующую выбранному вами варианту ответа. Вы услышите запись дважды.

There is a growing tendency in Kenya to

1)look for new farm land.

2)explore new hunting areas.

3)preserve native animal habitats.

According to Ben, people living around the forest area

1)try to domesticate some of the wild animals.

2)do their best to stop deforestation in the area.

3)could be in danger from wild animals.

According to Ben, an excommunicated animal is

1)an animal doomed to extinction.

2)an aggressive and uncontrollable animal.

3)an animal that needs people’s help.

Ben claims that people living around the forest area make extra money

1)catching and selling wild animals to the zoos.

2)travelling to other regions and doing odd jobs.

3)trading wooden products.

The Green Belt Movement in Kenya aims at

1)effective exploitation of natural forests.

2)replacing destroyed forests.

3)moving people out from the forest area.

The interviewer is curious to know if

1)the BBC has ever shown programs about wildlife protection in Kenya.

2)all the facts about safari in Kenya presented on BBC television are true.

3)people in Kenya have ever seen any BBC wildlife programs.

Visitors to safari parks in Kenya are allowed to

1)choose their own routes.

2)feed wild animals.

3)drive their own cars.

©2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 6 )

По окончании выполнения заданий В1 и А1–А14 НЕ ЗАБУДЬТЕ ПЕРЕНЕСТИ СВОИ ОТВЕТЫ В БЛАНК ОТВЕТОВ № 1! ОБРАТИТЕ ВНИМАНИЕ, что ответы на задания В1, А1–А14 располагаются в разных частях бланка. В1 расположено в нижней части бланка. При переносе ответов в задании В1 буквы записываются без пробелов и знаков препинания.

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 7 )

Раздел 2. Чтение

B2 Установите соответствие между заголовками 1–8 и текстами A–G. Занесите свои ответы в таблицу. Используйте каждую цифру только один раз. В задании один заголовок лишний.

1.

First computers

5.

Professional sport

2.

Risky sport

6.

Shopping from home

3.

Shopping in comfort

7.

New users

4.

Difficult task

8.

Digging for the past

A.A group of university students from Brazil have been given the job of discovering and locating all the waterfalls in their country. It is not easy because very often the maps are not detailed. The students have to remain in water for long periods of time. Every day they cover a distance of 35 to 40 kilometers through the jungle, each carrying 40 kilos of equipment.

B.For many years now, mail-order shopping has served the needs of a certain kind of customers. Everything they order from a catalogue is delivered to their door. Now, though, e-mail shopping on the Internet has opened up even more opportunities for this kind of shopping.

C.Another generation of computer fans has arrived. They are neither spotty schoolchildren nor intellectual professors, but pensioners who are learning computing with much enthusiasm. It is particularly interesting for people suffering from arthritis as computers offer a way of writing nice clear letters. Now pensioners have discovered the Internet and at the moment they make up the fastest growing membership.

D.Shopping centres are full of all kinds of stores. They are like small, selfcontained towns where you can find everything you want. In a large centre, shoppers can find everything they need without having to go anywhere else. They can leave their cars in the shopping centre car park and buy everything in a covered complex, protected from the heat, cold or rain.

E.Not many people know that, back in the fifties, computers were very big, and also very slow. They took up complete floors of a building, and were less powerful, and much slower than any of today’s compact portable computers. At first, the data they had to process and record was fed in on punched-out paper; later magnetic tape was used, but both systems were completely inconvenient.

F.Potholing is a dull name for a most interesting and adventurous sport. Deep underground, on the tracks of primitive men and strange animals who have

©2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 8 )

adapted to life without light, finding unusual landscapes and underground lakes, the potholer lives an exciting adventure. You mustn’t forget, though, that it can be quite dangerous. Without the proper equipment you can fall, get injured or lost.

G.Substantial remains of an octagonal Roman bath house, probably reused as a Christian baptistry, have been uncovered during a student training excavation near Faversham in Kent. The central cold plunge pool was five metres across, and stood within a structure which also had underfloor heating and hot pools, probably originally under a domed roof.

A

B

C

D

E

F

G

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 9 )

B3 Прочитайте текст и заполните пропуски A–F частями предложений,

обозначенными цифрами 1–7. Одна из частей в списке 1–7 лишняя. Зане-

сите цифру, обозначающую соответствующую часть предложения, в таблицу.

Before the Hubble Space Telescope was launched, scientists thought they knew the universe. They were wrong.

The Hubble Space Telescope has changed many scientists’ view of the universe. The telescope is named after American astronomer Edwin Hubble, A _______________________.

He established that many galaxies exist and developed the first system for their classifications.

In many ways, Hubble is like any other telescope. It simply gathers light. It is roughly the size of a large school bus. What makes Hubble special is not what it is, B _______________________.

Hubble was launched in 1990 from the “Discovery” space shuttle and it is about 350 miles above our planet, C _______________________.

It is far from the glare of city lights, it doesn’t have to look through the air, D _______________________.

And what a view it is! Hubble is so powerful it could spot a fly on the moon. Yet in an average orbit, it uses the same amount of energy as 28 100-watt

light bulbs. Hubble pictures require no film. The telescope takes digital images E _______________________.

Hubble has snapped photos of storms on Saturn and exploding stars. Hubble doesn’t just focus on our solar system. It also peers into our galaxy and beyond. Many Hubble photos show the stars that make up the Milky Way galaxy. A galaxy is a city of stars.

Hubble cannot take pictures of the sun or other very bright objects, because doing so could “fry” the telescope’s instruments, but it can detect infrared and ultra violet light F _______________________.

Some of the sights of our solar system that Hubble has glimpsed may even change the number of planets in it.

1.which is above Earth’s atmosphere.

2.which are transmitted to scientists on Earth.

3.which is invisible to the human eye.

4.who calculated the speed at which galaxies move.

5.so it has a clear view of space.

6.because many stars are in clouds of gas.

7.but where it is.

A

B

C

D

E

F

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 10 )

Прочитайте текст и выполните задания А15–А21. В каждом задании обведите цифру 1, 2, 3 или 4, соответствующую выбранному вами варианту ответа.

The Slob’s Holiday

My husband and I went to Reno for our holiday last year. “Isn’t that place where people go to get a quickie divorce?” asked my second son? ‘Yes’, I said, trying to look enigmatic and interesting. ‘You are not getting divorced, are you?’ he asked bluntly. ‘No,’ I said, ’we are going to an outdoor pursuit trade fair. The children sighed with relief and slouched away, muttering things like ‘boring’. I call them children, but they are all grown up. My eldest son has started to develop fine lines around his eyes – fledgling crow’s feet. A terrible sight for any parent to see. Anyway, the piece isn’t about children. It’s about holidays.

The first thing to be said about holidays is that anybody who can afford one should be grateful. The second thing is that planning holidays can be hard work. In our household it starts with somebody muttering, ’I suppose we ought to think about a holiday.’ This remark is usually made in July and is received glumly, as if the person making it has said ‘I suppose we ought to think about the Bolivian balance of payment problems.’

Nothing much happens for a week and then the potential holiday-makers are rounded up and made to consult their diaries. Hospital appointments are taken into consideration, as are important things to do with work. But other highlights on the domestic calendar, such as the cat’s birthday, are swept aside and eventually two weeks are found. The next decision is the most painful: where?

We travel abroad to work quite a lot but we return tired and weary, so the holiday we are planning is a slob’s holiday: collapse on a sunbed, read a book until the sun goes down, stagger back to hotel room, shower, change into glad rags, eat well, wave good-bye to teenagers, have a last drink on hotel terrace, go to bed and then lie awake and wait for hotel waiters to bring the teenagers from the disco.

I never want to be guided around another monument, as long as I live. I do not want to be told how many bricks it took to build it. I have a short attention span for such details. I do not want to attend a ‘folk evening’ ever, ever again. The kind where men with their trousers tucked into their socks wave handkerchiefs in the direction of women wearing puff-sleeved blouses, long skirts and headscarves.

I also want to live dangerously and get brown. I want my doughy English skin change from white sliced to wheat germ. I like the simple pleasure of removing my watch strap and gazing at the patch of virgin skin beneath.

I don’t want to make new friends – on holidays or in general; I can’t manage the ones I have at home. I do not want to mix with the locals and I have no

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 11 )

wish to go into their homes. I do not welcome tourists who come to Leicester

into my home. Why should the poor locals in Holidayland be expected to? It’s

bad enough that we monopolize their beaches, clog their pavements and spend

an hour in a shop choosing a sunhat that costs the equivalent of 75 pence.

So, the slob’s holiday has several essential requirements: a hotel on a

sunny beach, good food, a warm sea, nightlife for the teenagers, a big crowd to

get lost in, and the absence of mosquitoes.

As I write, we are at the planning stage. We have looked through all the

holiday brochures, but they are full of references to ‘hospitable locals’, ‘folk

nights’, ‘deserted beaches’, and ‘interesting historical sights’. Not our cup of

tea, or glass of sangria, at all.

The parents’ choice of holiday destination made the narrator’s children feel

A15

1)

jealous.

2)

excited.

3)

alarmed.

4)

indifferent.

A16

The narrator’s words ‘A terrible sight for any parent to see’ refer to

1)

the way children behave.

2)

the fact that children are aging.

3)

the way children change their image.

4)

the fact there is a generation gap.

When the need for holiday planning is first announced in the narrator’ family, it

A17

1)

is regarded as an important political issue.

2)

is met with enthusiasm by all the family.

3)

seems like an impossible task.

4)

is openly ignored.

A18

To find a two-week slot for a holiday potential holiday-makers have to

1)

negotiate the optimum period for travel.

2)

cancel prior business appointments.

3)

re-schedule individual summer plans.

4)

make a list of the things to be taken into account.

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 12 )

A19 The slob’s holiday is the type of holiday for people, who

1)do not want to go on holiday abroad.

2)go on holiday with teenagers.

3)do not like public life.

4)prefer peaceful relaxing holidays.

A20 When the narrator says ‘I also want to live dangerously’, she means

1)getting lost in the crowd.

2)going sightseeing without a guide.

3)choosing herself the parties to go to.

4)lying long hours in the sun on the beach.

A21 The main reason the narrator doesn’t want to mix up with locals is because she

1)doesn’t let tourists to her house at Leicester.

2)doesn’t want to add to their inconveniencies.

3)is afraid to make friends with local people.

4)values her own privacy above all.

По окончании выполнения заданий В2, В3 и А15–А21 НЕ ЗАБУДЬТЕ ПЕРЕНЕСТИ СВОИ ОТВЕТЫ В БЛАНК ОТВЕТОВ № 1! ОБРАТИТЕ ВНИМАНИЕ, что ответы на задания В2, В3, А15–А21 располагаются в разных частях бланка.

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 13 )

Раздел 3. Грамматика и лексика

Прочитайте приведенные ниже тексты. Преобразуйте, если необходимо, слова, напечатанные заглавными буквами в конце строк, обозначенных номерами B4–B10, так, чтобы они грамматически соответствовали содержанию текстов. Заполните пропуски полученными словами. Каждый пропуск соответствует отдельному заданию из группы B4–B10.

A Smart Boy

Mr. Jones and Mr. Brown worked in the same office. Their

B4

__________________ were good friends. One day Mr. Jones

WIFE

invited to Mr. Brown to a small party. Mr. Brown went into

the other room and telephoned his wife.

When he came back Mr. Jones asked him, “Have you spoken

to your wife already?”

B5

“No, she __________________ there when I phoned. My

NOT BE

small son answered the phone. I asked him, “Is your mother

there?” And he said, “She is somewhere outside”.

B6

“Why is she outside?” I asked. “She __________________

LOOK

for me”, he answered.

The Great Wall of China

The Great Wall of China runs for 6,700 kilometers from east

B7

to west of China. It is one of the __________________

GREAT

wonders of the world.

The Great Wall __________________ in order to protect

BUILD

B8

the country form different aggressors.

B9

The construction of the Wall __________________ in the 6th

BEGIN

century BC and lasted until the 16th century AD.

B10

Since then, the Great Wall of China __________________ a

BECOME

Symbol of wisdom and bravery of the Chinese people and a

monument to Chinese nation for many hundreds of years.

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 14 )

Прочитайте приведенный ниже текст. Преобразуйте, если необходимо, слова, напечатанные заглавными буквами в конце строк, обозначенных номерами В11–В16, так, чтобы они грамматически и лексически соответствовали содержанию текста. Заполните пропуски полученными словами. Каждый пропуск соответствует отдельному заданию из группы

В11–В16.

UK: Conservation and Environment

Going for a walk is the most popular leisure activity in Britain. Despite its high __________________ density and widespread, the UK has many unspoilt rural and coastal areas.

Twelve National Parks are freely accessible to the public and were created to conserve the __________________ beauty, wildlife and cultural heritage they contain.

Most of the land in National Parks is privately owned, but administered by an independent National Park Authority which works to balance the expectations of

__________________ with the need to conserve these open spaces for future generations.

The UK also works to improve the global environment and has taken global warming __________________ ever since scientists discovered the hole in the ozone layer.

In 1997, the UK subscribed to the Kyoto Protocol binding developed countries to reduce emissions of the six main greenhouse gases. The Protocol declares environmental

__________________.

Nowadays British __________________ are taking part in one of the largest international projects that is undertaken to protect endangered species.

POPULATE

NATURE

VISIT

SERIOUS

PROTECT SCIENCE

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 15 )

Прочитайте текст с пропусками, обозначенными номерами А22–А28.

Эти номера соответствуют заданиям A22–A28, в которых представлены

возможные варианты ответов. Обведите номер выбранного вами вари-

анта ответа.

Tracy

Tracy was as excited as a child about her first trip abroad. Early in the

morning, she stopped at a

A22

______ agency and reserved a suite on the Sig-

nal Deck of the Queen Elizabeth II. The next three days she spent buying

clothes and luggage.

On the morning of the sailing, Tracy hired a limousine to drive her to the

pier. When she

A23

______ at Pier 90, where the Queen Elizabeth II was

docked, it was crowded with photographers and television reporters, and for a

moment Tracy was panic stricken. Then she realized they were interviewing the

two men posturing at the foot of the gangplank. The members of the crew were

helping the passengers with their luggage. On deck, a steward looked at Tracy’s

ticket and

A24

______ her to her stateroom. It was a lovely suite with a private

terrace. It

had

been ridiculously expensive but Tracy

A25

______ it was worth

it.

She unpacked and then wandered along the corridor. In almost every

cabin there were farewell parties going on, with laughter and champagne and

conversation. She felt a sudden ache of loneliness. There was no one to see her

A26

______, no one for her to care about, and no one who cared about her. She

was

sailing into a completely unknown future.

Suddenly she felt the huge ship shudder as the tugs started to pull it out of

the harbor, and she stood

A27

______ the passengers on the boat deck, watch-

ing the Statue of Liberty slide

out of

A28

______, and then she went exploring.

1)

journey

2)

trip

3)

travel

4)

tourist

A22

1)

achieved

2)

arrived

3)

entered

4)

reached

A23

1)

set

2)

came

3)

headed

4)

directed

A24

1)

determined

2)

resolved

3)

decided

4)

assured

A25

1)

in

2)

off

3)

of

4)

after

A26

1)

among

2)

along

3)

between

4)

besides

A27

1)

glance

2)

stare

3)

sight

4)

look

A28

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 16 )

По окончании выполнения заданий В4–В16, А22–А28 НЕ ЗАБУДЬТЕ ПЕРЕНЕСТИ СВОИ ОТВЕТЫ В БЛАНК ОТВЕТОВ №1! ОБРАТИТЕ ВНИМАНИЕ, что ответы на задания В4–В16, А22–А28 располагаются в разных частях бланка. При переносе ответов в заданиях В4–В16 буквы записываются без пробелов и знаков препинания.

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 17 )

Раздел 4. Письмо

Для ответов на задания С1 и С2 используйте бланк ответов № 2. При выполнении заданий С1 и С2 особое внимание обратите на то, что ваши ответы будут оцениваться только по записям, сделанным в бланке ответов № 2. Никакие записи черновика не будут учитываться экспертом. Обратите внимание также на необходимость соблюдения указанного объёма текста. Тексты недостаточного объёма, а также часть текста, превышающая требуемый объём – не оцениваются. Запишите сначала номер задания (С1, С2), а затем ответ на него. Если одной стороны бланка недостаточно, вы можете использовать его другую сторону.

C1 You have 20 minutes to do this task.

You have received a letter from your English-speaking pen-friend Tom who writes:

… In Great Britain most young people want to become independent from their parents as soon as possible. Could you tell me what you and your friends think about not relying on your parents? Are you ready to leave your family immediately after you finish school? Is it easy to rent a house or an apartment for students in Russia?

As for the latest news, I have just returned from a trip to Scotland…

Write a letter to Tom.

In your letter

answer his questions

ask 3 questions about his trip to Scotland

Write 100 – 140 words.

Remember the rules of letter writing.

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 18 )

C2 You have 40 minutes to do this task. Comment on the following statement.

Some people think that life-long friendship exists only in books and films. Others believe that it exists in real life.

What is your opinion? Write 200–250 words.

Use the following plan:

make an introduction (state the problem)

express your personal opinion and give reasons for it

give arguments for the other point of view and explain why you don’t agree with it

draw a conclusion

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 19 )

Приложение 1

Тексты для аудирования

Вы сейчас будете выполнять тест по аудированию. Во время его выполнения перед каждым заданием дана пауза, с тем чтобы вы смогли просмотреть вопросы к заданию, а также паузы после первичного и повторного предъявления аудиотекста для внесения ответов. По окончании выполнения всего раздела «Аудирование» перенесите свои ответы в бланк ответов.

Задание В1

Вы услышите 6 высказываний. Установите соответствие между высказываниями каждого говорящего 1–6 и утверждениями, данными в списке A–G. Используйте каждое утверждение, обозначенное соответствую-

щей буквой, только один раз. В задании есть одно лишнее утвержде-

ние. Вы услышите запись дважды. Занесите свои ответы в таблицу. У вас есть 20 секунд, чтобы ознакомиться с заданием.

Now we are ready to start.

Speaker 1

I love reading. I read detective and spy stories, novels, and romantic and fantasy stories. If I’m stuck on a train or waiting for something and don’t have anything to read, I feel terrible. So something that I spend a lot of money on would probably be books. I always buy a lot of books, magazines and reader’s digests. And I keep all of them at home – my mum says it’s horrible. Also lots of my money goes on audio books. I always share them with friends. Em … it’s kind of an exchange.

Speaker 2

Oh, you know, shiny things really attract me. Every time I have some extra money, I buy bracelets, rings, earrings or necklaces. I wear them everywhere and every day. If I’m shopping somewhere and there is something flashy shining at me, I usually stop and look and very often a salesperson can talk me into buying it. It’s crazy I know. I also love buying books but I don’t spend so much on them.

Speaker 3

Ah, I spend money mostly on um … going out, like going to restaurants or clubs, and things like that. I am a party person, I love hanging out with friends. I don’t actually buy a lot of things, like electronics, books or CDs. I just spend money on going out with my friends, on food and drinks for parties. I really love chatting, dancing and making jokes.

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

Демонстрационный вариант КИМ ЕГЭ 2011 г. АНГЛИЙСКИЙ ЯЗЫК, 11 класс.

(2011 — 20 )

Speaker 4

Something I probably spend too much on is clothes. I guess because I am a girl, I think of shopping as a fun pastime and I find it relaxing. Actually I call it “shopping therapy” to go and buy some new clothes. I often go alone – I don’t need anyone to advise me. I’d say I love the process of choosing and buying things. It really makes me feel good.

Speaker 5

If I had the money I wanted, I would like to go and spend two weeks at every famous place on Earth. I love traveling in comfort. Nowadays it’s very expensive. I read travel magazines and surf the Internet for information about different tours, hotels and sights – and now I know how I want to travel. That’s what I’d spend my money on if I could.

Speaker 6

I usually don’t spend that much money on anything like jewellery or clothes. But then if there is one big expense, it is food. I like desserts, especially ice cream, so when I go out for dinner I definitely have a dessert afterwards. I can’t live without cakes, candies, chocolates and things like that. Who can?

You have 15 seconds to complete the task. (Pause 15 seconds.) Now you will hear the texts again. (Repeat.)

This is the end of the task. You now have 15 seconds to check your answers. (Pause 15 seconds.)

Задания А1–А7

Вы услышите телефонный разговор. Определите, какие из приведенных утверждений А1–А7 соответствуют содержанию текста (1 – True), какие не соответствуют (2 – False) и о чем в тексте не сказано, то есть на основании текста нельзя дать ни положительного, ни отрицательного ответа (3 – Not stated). Обведите номер выбранного вами варианта ответа. Вы услышите запись дважды. У вас есть 20 секунд, чтобы ознакомиться с заданиями.

Now we are ready to start.

Receptionist: English Language Center. How may I help you?

Caller: Yes. I’ve heard about your centre from my classmate and I’m calling to find out more information about your program. What kind of courses do you offer?

Receptionist: Well, first of all, the purpose of our program is to provide language learning opportunities for students who would like to master basic language skills, let’s say, for his or her job, or to study intensively to enter a US college or university.

© 2011 Федеральная служба по надзору в сфере образования и науки Российской Федерации

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The Slob’s Holiday

My husband and I went to Reno for our holiday last year. “Isn’t that place where people go to get a quickie divorce?” asked my second son? ‘Yes’, I said, trying to look enigmatic and interesting. ‘You are not getting divorced, are you?’ he asked bluntly. ‘No,’ I said, ’we are going to an outdoor pursuit trade fair. The children sighed with relief and slouched away, muttering things like ‘boring’. I call them children, but they are all grown up. My eldest son has started to develop fine lines around his eyes – fledgling crow’s feet. A terrible sight for any parent to see. Anyway, the piece isn’t about children. It’s about holidays.

The first thing to be said about holidays is that anybody who can afford one should be grateful. The second thing is that planning holidays can be hard work. In our household it starts with somebody muttering, ’I suppose we ought to think about a holiday.’ This remark is usually made in July and is received glumly, as if the person making it has said ‘I suppose we ought to think about the Bolivian balance of payment problems.

Nothing much happens for a week and then the potential holiday-makers are rounded up and made to consult their diaries. Hospital appointments are taken into consideration, as are important things to do with work. But other highlights on the domestic calendar, such as the cat’s birthday, are swept aside and eventually two weeks are found. The next decision is the most painful: where?

We travel abroad to work quite a lot but we return tired and weary, so the holiday we are planning is a slob’s holiday: collapse on a sunbed, read a book until the sun goes down, stagger back to hotel room, shower, change into glad rags, eat well, wave good-bye to teenagers, have a last drink on hotel terrace, go to bed and then lie awake and wait for hotel waiters to bring the teenagers from the disco.

I never want to be guided around another monument, as long as I live. I do not want to be told how many bricks it took to build it. I have a short attention span for such details. I do not want to attend a ‘folk evening’ ever, ever again. The kind where men with their trousers tucked into their socks wave handkerchiefs in the direction of women wearing puff-sleeved blouses, long skirts and headscarves.

I also want to live dangerously and get brown. I want my doughy English skin change from white sliced to wheat germ. I like the simple pleasure of removing my watch strap and gazing at the patch of virgin skin beneath.

I don’t want to make new friends – on holidays or in general; I can’t manage the ones I have at home. I do not want to mix with the locals and I have no wish to go into their homes. I do not welcome tourists who come to Leicester into my home. Why should the poor locals in Holidayland be expected to? It’s bad enough that we monopolize their beaches, clog their pavements and spend an hour in a shop choosing a sunhat that costs the equivalent of 75 pence.

So, the slob’s holiday has several essential requirements: a hotel on a sunny beach, good food, a warm sea, nightlife for the teenagers, a big crowd to get lost in, and the absence of mosquitoes.

As I write, we are at the planning stage. We have looked through all the holiday brochures, but they are full of references to ‘hospitable locals’, ‘folk nights’, ‘deserted beaches’, and ‘interesting historical sights’. Not our cup of tea, or glass of sangria, at all.

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